The eleven first-person essays in this collection are hopeful and cautionary tales written by an expert on the fortitude, strength, and delusion required to pursue lifelong dreams that just won’t drop dead. The stories lay bare the tenacity, courage, and perseverance of the human spirit and its unwavering ability to keep going in the face of abject rejection. The hope is the same in each adventure: this time, it’ll work out.

Dani’s unique brand of humor cultivates intimate tales of her attempts to break into show business while skewering the absurdities and indignities of trying to ‘make it’ while clawing her way to the middle rung on the ladder of success. Her youthful goals were absolute: to be as famous as Valerie Bertinelli, star as Annie on Broadway, and become the next Bette Midler. She tried everything to achieve her goals, from acting camp and two prestigious film schools to moving to Hollywood and marrying a musician. 

But after decades of keeping the faith, she walked away. She’d concussed herself too many times. While wandering outside the Hollywood bubble, she believed she would find something else to satisfy her. And thus, several essays are unrelated to show business but not any less tragic and humiliating.

Against Dani’s better judgment, her childhood dreams persisted in pulling her back in. “I can’t go on doing this forever; it would look really dumb for a 45-year woman to be out there doing what I do.”—Cher. She and Cher are dumb.